I'm getting better

I wanted to write down the number 29, so I wouldn’t forget how much thrivingviolet had favourited me.
When I wrote it, realised it was your birthday, and threw it out.
I’m never gonna forget that number.
And I don’t need another reminder of you.

You're quirky in ways I love. – Mirruku Chii

I don’t know if you guys remember him talking about how he liked me cuz I’m quirky. But I do. Remember my kick ass memory? Yeah, I hate it! Because, for everyone else, things drain, and for me, they may as well have happened yesterday. Time doesn’t heal all wounds when time changes nothing. Sure, I love being able to remember our drama script and stuff like that, but, sometimes, it’s not worth it.

I don’t know whether or not I’m over you. I think I am. Simply because I love the idea of you being stuck on 36636422. It makes me feel warm inside. Like, you’re getting more than me; you’re getting what you deserve. To you, she is beauty itself. It sort explores the only facet of your personality that I never dealt with, your ability to love unconditionally. You loved her for 6 years. And you never told anyone. She’s the one who made you depressed. It hurts me that she did that to you, and yet, I feel this little place in my heart for her. The girl I’ve never met. That’s how you explained her. She was your sun, your stars, your sky.

Maybe it would help if you had moved on. Properly. None of this “I’ve put my life in perspective” bullshit. As in, you’d actually moved on. Then I could too. I don’t like getting hurt by you, it’s not fair. But I don’t feel how I used to about you.

I’m all confused for sure, especially since you still seem to be everything. But I’m going back into that phase of my life I was in a few weeks ago, I don’t miss you as I used to, and I’m accepting things as they are.