Boyblab

Ok, too bad, I wanna blog about him again, cuz he’s my every thought, so you guys just go read my other blog for today so you don’t feel like killing me.
You’re kinds perfect, you’re kinds everything im not…
But I wish I was.
You’re the me I wish I could be but never had the guts
I keep saying this, but I need to re-iterate it
Because I want you to know why I’m so bloody clingy
And why I can’t let go
Even though I should
You know what I hold onto??
I’ll tell you:
I feel like I’ve stuffed up.
With life.
I mean, sure, maybe it’s self-esteem issues, or whatever. But I’m pretty sure I stuffed up. This isn’t how I was supposed to turn out, I did it all wrong.
But you? You did everything right. You ended up as the perfect me. The right person. And you know how people always say “If you were someone else, would you be your friend?” I always think no, cuz I’m a bitch. But when you talk to me, it’s like… maybe I haven’t stuffed up as much as I thought I had. Because if the person I should be still thinks I’m okay, then maybe I am okay.
I don’t even care if that makes sense, because I don’t need it to make sense to anyone but me, or to anything but my heart.
That’s just how things are.

I’m still holding onto that tiny bit of me that wishes I could be you.Because even though things are usually pretty stuffed up in your life (and so say all of us), you must get some self-satisfaction out of knowing that you’re a good person. That you try hard, and you do the right thing.