Inspired by Amy.
I normally wait until the end of the year, look back, and say 'that was a great year'.
But this year... that's a load of bullshit.
It has actually been a pretty bad year, and it's in pretty much all aspects of my life.
My group is drifting further apart. We're never all togetehr, and the times that we are, there are more people with us, and we can't be a group. We never spend an entire lunch or recess at our table, everyone's always off doing their own stuff.
My family is getting worse. My parents fight daily now, and even about stupid things
"You never said you didn't want me to do it"
"I never said I wanted you to either"
"But you didn't object when I brought it up"
"You could have asked whether I thought it was a good idea"
"But you just went along with it, you never said..."
Oh yeah, well done guys.
And my mum gets pissed off at me ALL the time, especially for being on my computer (She's at work now, it's okay)
My sister and I, sure we're close, we'll always be close, but we're not as close as we used to be.
My extended family on my dad's side are a little closer after everything that happened with my grandfather, and that's a nice change. But my mum's side hate each other more than ever, she cries when thinking of them now.
And I've sent half my year feeling terrible about myself because of some guy.
So all-in-all, my year pretty much sucked.
... I'll smile anyway.
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3 comments:
:O
I made you feel terrible about yourself?
I'm so sorry, if i had of known that i would have done something earlier, i thought...
it doesn't matter what i think, i will do watever it takes to make u happy, because u deserve it...
I have a song, which i always liked, but it is very specific, and so i never really could relate to it, only wish i could, and then as i got older, it just become a stupid fantasy because wat it says is officaly "wrong" now...
but lately, i been thinking, if somehow, in this retarted world, we could work it out, i would be able to relate to the song, and sing it to u, and unleash all my emotions knowing that it's not just a fantasy anymore, but a beautiful reality...
She's just sixteen years old
Leave her alone, they say
Separated by fools
Who don't know what love is yet
But I want you to know
If I could fly
I'd pick you up
I'd take you into the night
And show you a love
Like you've never seen, ever seen
It's like having a dream
Where nobody has a heart
It's like having it all
And watching it fall apart
And I would wait till the end
Of time for you
And do it again, it's true
I can't measure my love
There's nothing to compare it to
But I want you to know
If I could fly
I'd pick you up
I'd take you into the night
And show you a love
Oooooh, if I could fly
I'd pick you up
I'd take you into the night
And show you a love
Like you've never seen, ever seen
Yeah, Ooooooh....
thats what i feel like doing when reading ur blogs, picking u up and taking u into the night, away from everything wrong with life...
This comment shall be the nail in my coffin, but it had to be posted, watever happens now i'm sorry, but know that I will always love you, u will always have a piece of my heart ;)
oh ebony, no one would notice that all of this is happening because of that smile on your face. i wish that i had known, so that i could have been there for you, or do something to make you feel even a little bit better. i'm sorry if you read my blog about this year, and thought it was all bullshit and crap. i think you're a really brave and beautiful person. don't change, and for what it's worth, i'm always here for you (L)
the smile is so decieving sometimes
but its good to say sometimes it stops others from suffering too.. :)
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