Please Don't Ask Me - John Farnham

i saw you today :)
it was nice... in a pleasant sort of way... i enjoy watching you... not in like, a creepy stalker watching, just a... content at witnessing such beauty...sort of watching :)

i wish i could still talk to you, i mean like, i tried to, and i just, sort of, spluttered,it was so...weird, i dont like that weirdness, i really dont like it, i miss you, the you i knew in like, year 7, when you sort of took me under your wing for a while...it was comfortable, maybe thats what brought this on, unenearthing all of that...

but it wasnt supposed to be weird, the holidays were supposed to help me move on, get over you, its worse now, its like, im enchanted by you, that freaks me out, and makes me feel all stalkerish... especially at the station today... lets not go there

you know, yesterday, lisa asked me if i was in love... i didnt really know what to say, i hadnt really thought about it, but i dont think i am, i told her i wasnt... i dunno if that was true, it was just how i felt

and amy said this blog was "nice... well not really nice...i dont know how to explain it", its so weird associating my people and you together, its like, my worlds colliding, when i try so hard to keep them separate, i guess, more than anything, i wanna know how my friends feel about how i feel about you...but im scared

scared what theyll think, scared how theyll react, scared they wont understand, or take it seriously... its like, this blog is really the only place i can be myself, i like that, cuz im not really an open person, in fact ive only ever been open with one person, and we havent spoken since, i like coming here, telling you things that i wont tell anyone else, cuz u wont read, so, its like, theres still that shell

im comfortable in that shell, its like, its home, i wanna stay there, but i want someone to join me... it doesnt have to be you, id probably prefer it if it was one of my friends, but i dont think it can be, my friends dont know me anymore, they dont know me at all, no one does, not even my siser, she used to though...

aahh, this blog is so emo :(

Please don't ask me what am I thinking
It's about you

And please don't ask me I never can see you
What can I do

My first impulse is to run to your side
My heart's not free, and so I must hide
Please don't ask me what I’m gonna say to you

I toss and turn can't sleep at night
It's worrying me
I go to bed turn out the light
But your face I see

It only hurts the more I pretend
That we could ever, be more than friends
Please don't ask me why I'm so in love with you

You could easily make me happy
That I know
But I’ll try my best to never tell you so

I will sing to you my love songs
And pretend
And I'll keep my secrets right down to the end

Please don't ask me why I'm not talking
I just can't explain

And please don't ask me why I go walking
Out in the rain

I could not live the lie it would take
To have you near would be a mistake

Please don't ask me why I'm still in love with you

No please don't ask me